The Bold Jumping Spider

Happy Halloween, from all of us at BugsIRL, including Phidippus audax - the Bold Jumping Spider!

My wife and I went out with friends last Saturday night for Halloween revelry. My wife was a Honey Bee (Apis mellifera) and I was a bee-keeper (Homo sapiens). Our costumes were great (if I do say so, myself), especially my wife's! But the best costume was a friend we went out with who dressed up as the character Mugatu, from the movie Zoolander. The bar awarded him both funniest and best over-all costume - he even beat the sexy nurse, the sexy zombie nurse, the sexy zombie soccer player, the sexy Betty Page (probably non-zombie), the sexy Snow White, sexy Sriracha bottles, sexy Freddy Krueger, and the sexy Jesus! Quite a win!

A good time was had by almost all (maybe the world just isn't ready for a sexy Jesus) and Disney's Gaston (as in: no one's quick as, no one's slick as, no one's neck's as incredibly thick as...), from Beauty & the Beast, even taught some of us how to Dougie. But there were also scary costumes: the drunk girl with the messed up makeup (in hindsight, this may not have been a costume), the guy in a black Morphsuit (for not apparent reason), the sexy Elmo, and the werewolf (I won't lie, sexy Jesus was also a little bit scary looking). But you know who would NOT have been scared of all those creepers? Phidippus audax: the Bold Jumping Spider - that's who!

I met the lovely lady pictured at the top of this post a few weeks ago in my garden, admiring my eggplants (no, really). If you check out the pics in my Flickr photogallery, you'll notice that she has orange spots on her abdomen - these will turn white once she's all grown. But despite her age, she was as brave as can be. I particularly like the picture at the top though, because it's one of the few I took where she was actually looking into the lens of my digital microscope. In almost all the other pictures, she's looking off to the side, making eye contact with me instead of the lens (making eye contact is typical of jumping spiders, especially Bold Jumpers)! After I took this picture, I actually left it maximized on my computer screen so that my wife would happen upon it. She did, and despite her initial shock, she later conceded that the spider was "actually sort of cute."

Campaign Poster #1 - Take a bold leap forward. Elect
Phidippus audax.

So I mentioned that the Bold Jumping Spider's scientific name is Phidippus audax. Audax is, of course the Latin word for "bold" that also gives us (that is, English speakers - suck it, Uzbekistan!) words like audacious, audacity, and other words that one might use to describe someone who took a half-step forward and kept talking after the Queen had clearly taken a half-step back (and this is why we never got invited back to the palace, Dad!). But according to my Latin-English dictionary, audax can also be used to mean things like "rash" and "foolhardy". Come to think of it, (because it's election season), "rash" and "foolhardy" might be words that you're currently using to describe the guy you're not voting for. Instead, you're probably smart enough to cast your ballot for the guy boldly putting forth bold plans for bold action...or whatever. If only there was a legitimate third party choice! Hmmm, maybe there's some other
candidate who might grace us with an election bid...

Campaign Poster #2 - Upwards & Onwards. Achieve the
future with P. audax's bold vision for a brighter tomorrow!

You can probably tell from these totally legit campaign posters at right that P. audax is a serious candidate for voting. BTW, if you start seeing campaign ads that say "P. audax", followed by "Chris Christie" in a smaller, Jokerman font, you'll know that the Bold Jumper has chosen her running mate.

So speaking of politics and Halloween (poliween?): while I was out cheering for my friend at the costume contest, something reminded me that I live in a swing state. No, it wasn't the girl dressed up as a sexy "binder full of women" - it was that, all night long, the TVs at the bar showed Hurricane Sandy coverage punctuated by political ads...at a bar!...on Halloween!

So even though she made a campaign stop at my house, I probably won't be writing in Phidippus audax on my ballot this week. I have made up my mind, but I have to say that I'm a little miffed. Apparently, neither presidential candidate is that interested in my vote. As a registered-Independent voter in a critical swing state, I haven't received a single piece of targeted mail (no, Candidate Robamney, "Current Resident" will not be reading your non-specific postcard) and I haven't received a single phone call (except for people wanting my wife to take a survey...Sweetheart, please don't give President Obama my cell phone number again).

During our time together, I found this Bold Jumping Spider to be very friendly (I think...how do you tell if a spider is being friendly?). I've read that Bold Jumpers will tolerate some handling and can even make good pets - not exactly a talking parrot, but probably more engaging than a sea urchin. I don't need any more pets (and I don't think P would tolerate a new social dynamic): I found her in the wilds of my garden, so that's where I returned her. As for handling her, I did seriously consider this (I wouldn't normally consider this because I'm neither an arachnologist nor a psychopath). In fact, most of the pictures of her were taken without the lid on the container. My reasons for ultimately not handling her though, fell somewhere between uncertainty that I could do so without hurting her and a level of boldness that fell short of hers. Besides, the Secret Service doesn't like people pawing the future POTUS.


All I need is a beat that's super bumpin' and for you, you, you to back it up and dump it. Put your arms out front, lean side-to-side. They gon' be on you when they see you hit dat Dougie, right?
 - Cali Swag District, 2010